In Reply to: GUYS!!! Help me out here! posted by Jane2 on June 29, 1999 at 10:53:19:

Okay I let the last posting slide, Kim, did a very good job explaining the cons of teen ownership, though not for everyone it does fit a majority of teens, as in yourself. The glider is in your dad's possession, therefore your limited only to when you are away.. as in the case of not being able to have the glider with you the other 12 of the 14 days. I also see you are looking for a way to NOT lose that irreplaceable bond. This in itself is an oxy-moron, in that in order to CONTINUE the bonding process, in order for it to get stronger and stronger, daily contact is required. Many people that leave their gliders for long periods of time, find that the bond, although once strong, sometimes goes backwards, In that they have to start the bonding process over again. Now let me taklk with you as if you were an adult, and you couldn't keep your glider at your residence for some reason or another. Lets say that you have a friend watch it for you, it gets awsome care, love, playtime etc.. but you don't see it often.. The glider will eventually bond with it's main caregiver, you will become a "playmate, a once in awhile friend. The bond will eventually transfer to the other party, there isn't anything you can do to stop that..Short of you being there with it..This is not a slam on teens, this is the facts of bonding and ownership. Gliders bond with their main caregiver, whoever plays with it, feeds it, spends the MOST time with it...It will only be a matter of time, as bonding varies in time..sometimes it take a week, sometimes several months, some haven't bonded after a year.. The past posts, as with this one, most people are all telling you the same thing.. In order to get and keep a bond with a glider, you HAVE to spend LOTS of time with it. The only solution to the question you are asking, is the same one everyone is telling you..To have the glider with you, whether you take it to your moms, or stay with your dad. If the Glider bonds heavily with you, and you leave it for a long period of time, It may get depressed, it may get lonely, and yes it MAY die..The people on this base, know the importance of the time that you spend with your glider, unlike kids, who can adapt to visits every couple of weeks, a glider may feel neglected, unloved, and just plain unwanted, it may rebel. They don't understand that there isn't anything you can do about the situation, they don't understand that you will be back. all it will know, is that kool kid that played with me is gone, she left, and I thought she loved me, This is a very tough position you are in, and I don't envy you one bit. This is a load for a teen to bear..But now, you have your own decisions to make..for what is best for the glider. Either find a way to get mom to allow you to take her to her home, or get dad to bond with the glider and you just be a friend to it. That would allow the glider to know, that the person it is bonding with, won't leave... Mind you, you did ask for help, and we are all trying to do that..The gliders are not like hamsters, gerbils, mice etc, that can just be transfered from person to person without some kind of consequences..

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