---Please do not think I am bashing everybody on this site because I know that there are many many of you who do help A LOT of people on here and that it is a very good site for information.---I've looked through a lot of these topics and I feel like in a lot of the topics with new glider owners I see people yelling at the person who asked the question and telling them that they obviously didn't do research. And a lot of times that is probably not the case at all. Speaking from experience, even after doing tons of research and watching a video about sugar gliders almost every night before the day I got my gliders I was still a little surprised at what I got. So I went to people with experience with gliders like on here. And everyone on here knows that there are bad websites that say they know everything about sugar gliders and misinform the unfortunate people who go to that website and believe it. Now that person did do research just in the wrong places and now they have their gliders and are afraid and confused because it's not what they expected. So they come here for help and what happens? They don't get advice from people they just get yelled at for not knowing what there doing when that is the reason they came here. And then when everyone gains up on them for looking for answers of course they're going to fight back and then there is no longer a question to be answered it is all just a fight. Even if the person didn't do research on the animal and bought it on a whim (and I realize this is not something to encourage) there is nothing you can do about it now so the best you can do for the person is answer their questions and help them to better take care of their sugar glider(s). Sorry for my rant :/ I just felt bad for the confused people who came to this site and other sites for advice and just got yelled at when they probably already feel bad enough. Thank you

Have you been reading current posts - or some of the old ones in the archives?

There really have not been any really confrontational threads here in quite some time.

Sometimes individuals do not take it well when we have to tell them that the information they have been given is incorrect.

Others have asked for advice - then refused to follow advice given. It is frustrating to answer the same questions over and over from the same person who chooses to ignore the experienced owners here in the forum.

I am often guilty of giving detailed answers along with the reasons for my recommendations. It is frustrating when an owner then has problems with their glider because they have ignored the suggestions given.

Keep in mind that sometimes the person replying to questions on the forum actually has little to NO experience with gliders - they are just reinforcing bad information they have found else where. Always look at the number of posts for the individual replying to a question. That will help you weigh their experience.

What type of answers to questions would you prefer to see?

xXChloeXx Well said :)

Hello and good morning!
I appreciate your effort to share your insight and encourage civil behavior. I have read posts on Facebook that have gotten very nasty: the use of swear words, exclamation points, calling people out by name, offensive words and phrases.
I have not ever seen that rude or abusive type posting here. It's been a pleasure to read the information provided and to learn from the folks here, and on occasion frustrating or sad. But I can thankfully say the posts have always been informative, almost always pleasant, and occasionally written with a touch of humor as well

I've noticed sometimes a member will ask a question, then when given responses with lots of information they seem to get defensive. I say "seem" because this falls into the bit of advice my father gave me:

My father says don't read tone/voice into texts or emails (and I'll add to that posts on this site) because that is your interpretation of the writer's intent. If you think that something sounds rude, try reading it in a different tone such as with care or concern. More than likely that tone will work with the words as well. You just cannot interpret tone and assume you know the writer's intent. Instead, ask a clarifying question to be sure. Now, if the writer is using rude words or inappropriate language, lots of capital letters or exclamation points, then they are most likely communicating rudeness with the use of those writing techniques.

This bit of advice has proven extremely helpful in avoiding misunderstandings in both my personal life as well as work. I hope you find it helpful, too!

Have a great Saturday

Alot can be misinterpreted through written word, especially on the internet. I have had it happen to me, and I'm sure I did it to other people... Writing out feelings on a screen is completely different from hearing it face to face. You're left without tone or body language to understand how your being spoken too.

Basically IMHO, you have take the information your asking for as the most important part of a thread and ignore the in-between. Afterall, you don't know the author from Adam and will probably never meet them.

Sticks and stones?...

I think everyone summed up the main points pretty well on this topic. Something else to consider is sometimes people get very passionate about the advice they are giving. Which can make it seem like an attack to the person receiving the information.

JlPrkr and I had an exchange of words on here one day about Pocket Pets We were both pretty passionate in our responses to each other and at the end of it we both understood each other and apologized to each other for the misinterpretations we both had. Even while we "argued" each of our points of view, I understood his and He tried to understand mine. The more we learn the more our points of view on certain things might change....

We don't always agree with each other, we have our own thoughts and opinions on things which needs to be respected. I don't expect anyone to have the same methods or beliefs as I do, but I do expect people to respect that the method works for me or that it's my belief from my experiences and I try to return that courtesy.

I've recently been told by a very respected person in the community that this forum is the absolute worst place new owners find to get information. She believes there is bullying and scare tactics used to get people to change how they do things whether it's about unsafe wheels or pellet food etc. She was even a little shocked that I'm a member here. I don't spend as much time here as I once did but I still check in to see if I can be of any help to anyone.

The other day someone posted on here a very heartbreaking post about considering putting her glider down. She got very little help here from anyone, basically a lot of oh I'm so sorry that is so such a hard thing to go through type response.

Instead of making a big commotion about it I gave her links to two people that could actually help her make her decision and get the vet care and financial aid she would need for the glider.

That same person that said this site is the worst place, was the ONE person that helped the lady in that situation. Then I told her THIS is why is still come to this forum, to HELP those people that really need it and wouldn't get it otherwise. If I hadn't posted on that thread it's pretty likely that glider would have been put down.

Instead the glider had her tail amputated and recovering nicely, she is now on a better diet and is actually eating annnnd is scheduled to go to one of the BEST Glider vets in the Country to have further testing done to find out what is going on with her. Vet bills from situations like this can overwhelm someone in a hurry so we are organizing an auction and have some Pledges in place already for each stage of the vet care.

I know this is long, but perhaps now you can see passed some of the bs and take a look at what some of us REALLY do here to try to help people. I'm not trying to brag but I have assisted in Rehoming several gliders from this forum into experienced loving forever homes, I have found people cage mates that needed them, I have helped in a couple tail amputations people needed and couldn't afford to have done, I've helped a local rescue find homes for surrendered gliders they couldn't take in, I've sent cage sets and toys to people at NO charge that needed them, I donate to fundraiser auctions to raise money for these tail amputations or vet procedures, I mentor several people, have helped several teenagers find their first gliders because they researched and worked hard to become a good glider owner, I look things up for people to lazy to look it up themselves, I help organize railroads to get gliders to their new homes, I spend everyday from the time I wake up until I fall asleep HELPING people with what ever I can.

So yeh occasionally one of my responses to someone seeking help can sound a bit harsh, especially when I have offered suggestions in detail to that person and the person largely ignored it. It gets frustrating and my time could of been spent helping someone that actually needs it and is trying and putting in an effort.

But frankly, were not here to blow smoke up your a%$ Your internet feelers aren't my first concern sometimes. Getting you the help and resources you need to take care of that glider is MY first concern and I try to do that as gently and nicely as possible but sometimeees My passion takes over... Keep in mind people don't get paid to be here we spend a lot of our time helping people with basic questions and sometimes we just have a bad day ourselves or are busy helping 9 other people with 15 different issues that they need help with.

Well said Leela. Its a shame some folks don't consider this site helpful. Its very easy to navigate and has useful accurate information. You just can't please everyone. Gotta just keep chugging along and do your best to help how you can.

I, for one, love this forum! It has been very useful in helping me be a better glider mom!