I havent talked about this before because its very painful for me.
My cousin, Joe, who besides being family, is also a great friend. About a 1 1/2 years ago, he was diagnosed with cancer - which started in his neck. He went thru all the usual treatments, meds, etc. But he was to far along and cancer had pretty much spread all over him. Joe has been very positive about his illness from the beginning - bound and determine to make it. Joe has bone caner, which is one of the most painful cancers you can get. And he has suffered. About 3 months ago, he was told it was in his brain. He called me that night and after he told me, he started crying so hard he hung up the phone. That was when he knew he wasnt going to make it.
Joe went steadily down hill and hospice was called about 6 weeks ago. Last week, he was given two to six weeks to live. Joe is a very good person but never a church goer. He decided he wanted to be baptized. Even tho he could barely stand up at that time, he wouldnt let the preacher come to their house to do the baptism - he wanted to go to the church. With help from family members, they got Joe to the church and he was able to get into the baptismal pool. He is on oxygen, so the preacher couldnt submerse him - only pour holy water over his head.
Joe is now totally bedridden - he is on morphine every two hours around the clock - he doesnt know anyone and can no longer even take a sip of water. Needless to say - he isnt going to be with us much longer.
Joe lives in Indiana. We have always remained close thru phone calls, letters and then e-mail. We have written to each other, sent jokes, vented, laughed with each other for many years. The last e-mail I got from him was July 7, 2008. The last time I was able to talk to him was 2 weeks ago - and he was gasping for breath with every word.
My cousin, my lifelong friend, Joe, hasnt passed yet - but he is gone. After talking to his sister, I think it has finally hit me today that I will never be able to talk to him again. Or read another of his e-mails. And I miss him already.
08-12-08 Joe passed away at 6:15 this morning.
Joe and I e-mailed almost every day for several years. The last e-mail I got from him was July 7, 2008.
His last e-mail had a link to this song and poem. I wonder if he was trying to tell me he knew his end was very near....
http://www.allright.com/Poems/TOLRailway/TOL.htm
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